A friend who's had a ton of dating success, both online and otherwise, recently sent me a flurry of despairing texts. "OMG, I am just so tired of this," she wrote. "It's always the same thing with the same guys and I'm sick of it." I told her the solution to her dating burnout was obvious: She needed to take a break.
Sometimes that's the only way to turn things around! Here are some signs that, like my friend, it might be smart if you gave dating a rest.
Sometimes you get hostile on dates. You didn't know you'd answer this new guy's "why are you still single?" question with such sarcastic vitriol, but it just poured out, surprising the both of you.
You don't think any of the guys actually know you. This was my friend's issue. The guys she dated all seemed to like her, but she had the nagging suspicion that if she asked them anything serious about her beliefs or feelings, they'd be clueless. She was just surface dating when she wanted more, but she couldn't break the habit.
The thought of dating exhausts you rather than excites you. You're more than happy to go to the movies with your mom or head to a bar with friends. The thought of actually meeting up with someone for a date, though? That's enough to make you want to burrow under your covers and never come out.
You've had a long string of bad dates. You don't know why, but one after the other has been awful. Whether it's because you can't hit your groove or all the guys you meet are uninspiring, you haven't met anyone you sparked with in some time.
All you want is a boyfriend. This one's counterintuitive, because of course a major reason people date is to find significant others. But sometimes when you want one so intensely, it makes it that much harder to bounce back when a date is a dud. Plus, people can tell when you're trying to fit them into some idealistic mold that might not actually work.
Your friends are tired of hearing about it. For a while, they may be too nice to say that your complaining about dating has gone a bit overboard. Eventually, one may snap and give you a verbal shakedown that hints you might talk about hating dating a tad too much.
It just isn't fun anymore. Dressing up for a date isn't the party it used to be. Neither is the getting-to-know-you conversation or the supposedly witty texting banter that comes after a date. To be frank, you're over it.
There's nothing wrong with giving yourself some time off. Think of it as a dating vacation. You'll get some much-needed rest and be able to dive back into dating with a fresh perspective and positive attitude.
Have you ever taken a self-imposed break from dating? What are some of the biggest signs you're in need of one?